"All or nothing thinking" will get you into trouble!

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

In the past, I would often fall victim to "all or nothing" thinking. I would set myself up for a huge task/commitment, then the minute I could not achieve one small piece of it -- I would throw my hands up in disgust and say, "forget it!" "I just cannot do anything right!"

Needless to say, I did not achieve any significant forward motion!

But something hit me yesterday. I had hoped to have a "perfect" day with lap band guidelines. The reality of my day, however, just did not allow that to occur, fullyl 100%.
I finally decided last night -- I don't have to be perfect to be a success!

I realized I do get kudos for trying to make the best of a bad situation. For example, I cannot do salads (my band won't let the salad go through) or white meat chicken -- and I was a passenger in a car that was stopping at Burger King for lunch. What to do? I decided to get a kids meal (non-fat milk, small fries, and cheese burger with no bun). I tracked the calories (did not eat too many of the fries, so that was good!).

I had to work late (unexpectedly) and I could sense my band was tight -- so I chose 2 plain hot dogs, no buns, as my dinner. Hot dogs ALWAYS go down!! Not the best choice, fat-wise, or sodium-wise -- but I could feel my inner critique start to badger me. Why did you choose that? What a bad idea, I scolded myself aftewards. The self-hatred was coming back... I could feel my desire for goodies start to surface. I eyed a Starbucks and a Baskin Robbins store on my way home..... I could turn into either of these establishments and "feel better" instantly. But what about the repurcussions?? I decided instead to shout outloud "NO!" - the heck with those drivers next to me thinking I am a crazy lady!

I stepped back and looked at the big picture. I have been known to eat very few fat grams in a day -- to the point where I almost eliminated all fats from my diet (which is bad, healthwise). So for me to have a "high fat" day is unusual. I need to recognize this and move on!

Yes, the choices were not stellar -- but they could have been WAY WAY worse!

So today I am doing better, and trying to not focus on being perfect. I can do this, by giving myself permission to screw up, and then get right back into the game.
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    what a wooo wooo blog!! :)
    4106 days ago
  • no profile photo CD1315172
    I've been there too. You have to take each day and make the best choices you can and not beat yourself up, just keep making those good choices and you will see results.
    4106 days ago
    Sounds to me like ya done good. You made some conscious food choices that were realistic to your circumstances. You could have had Whopper with bacon and cheese, supersize fries, and a mega-iced coffee.
    4107 days ago
    You are right on!! This has been one of my biggest areas of growth on this journey. All or nothing is a killer - not just to weight loss, but in just about every area. We have been in family counseling for relational issues with our teen boys, and almost every week the issue of "all or nothing" or "black and white" thinking comes up because of how much damage it does. The psychologist encourages us to 'learn to live in the gray area' because that's where the balance is! The big picture is what it is all about. Some days we don't make good choices, but that does not mean we failed, and it does not make it okay to throw in the towel. I commend you for your insight and for staying on track in spite of your circumstances. YOU GO GIRL!!!!

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    4107 days ago
    Nosamacire -- the guidelines are:

    Eat only three small meals a day - this is all you need. Do not snack between meals.

    Eat only solid foods at mealtime - this is how the LAP-BAND® works to restrict food.

    Eat slowly and chew your food thoroughly, about 15-20 times a bite, until it reaches a liquid consistency - this will help to create the feeling of fullness and make it less likely for food to get stuck in the LAP-BAND® pouch.

    Stop eating when you feel full - eating too much can result in pain, nausea and vomiting. It can also stretch the LAP-BAND® pouch.

    Choose healthy foods - make sure you are getting enough protein and nutrients.

    Do not drink while you eat - this will wash down the food and you will not reach the feeling of fullness, defeating the purpose of the LAP-BAND®. Do not drink for 30 to 45 minutes before or after meals.

    4107 days ago
    What are the lap band guidelines? I need to practice this too. When you fall ... get back up and keep going (instead it takes me down) and is an incredibly horrid cycle that never ends.
    4107 days ago
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