I'm starting a streak today! And I'm slammin it! Praise God!
It sure feels great when you can mentally and physically follow your plan/lifestyle.
I could not have done it without answered prayer. Without God's strength.
April is a hard month for me. Yesterday my oldest, first born would have turned 38. It was her birthday. Her name was Angel Ruth, I was 19 when I had her. I had been told at age 16 I'd never give birth to children. I asked God, "Why did You give her to me only to take her away."
10 years ago this July, she died. Now April is my melancholy month. Happy-sad-happy-sad. I became a mother for the very first time in April. And then I lost the child who opened my world to my new life as a mother. My life has never been the same. It didn't help that my last baby, my "surprise" baby (born when I was 47) was 6 months old when she died. She got to hold him, but he has no memory of her.
I also have 2 other precious daughters in Heaven. Both had medical conditions that let us know each day was a gift. But my daughter Angel's death was sudden, out of the blue, an un-expected a car accident. She was 5 months pregnant (with a daughter her fiance' named Angel Marie) getting married in 2 weeks, with her other 2 daughters (then 4 and 7) in the back seat. The girls survived. That was a blessing. But my baby died. She was supposed to take care of me in my old age. I was supposed to die first. It's not supposed to work like this.
Today when I woke up my heart was heavy. But I knew what I needed to do. I needed to take care of myself. I had fallen off plan the last 2 weeks- and eaten the worst ever, But today with every ounce of my strength, I chose to live. I chose to resume eating on plan. And it felt good. It felt like I slammed it. I can do this!
I had a set back. I'm human and life, well life, darn it ............is hard. But why make it harder. In the last 2 weeks my blood sugars soared, my Type 2 was not helped by my bad food choices. I felt like cr*p. Which at the time felt like what I deserved. But that was a lie. I couldn't think clearly off plan.
I prayed. I prayed and prayed and prayed. I prayed as the hopeless, helpless person I am with out God's strength. He answered. I don't deserve the grace He gives- but I take it. I willingly, desperately take it. He lifted me out of my pit. Thank You God! Thank You!
So my new motto!
I'm slammin it! And I'm not letting anything get in my way. God's Army Angels are always by my side! (from a favorite Chris Tomlin song)
and love to you ALL!