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Try again for the upteenth time

Monday, February 02, 2015

My husband and I have been sick for several weeks. I haven't ate as well as I should have. I baby sit a one year old and a 3 year old about 2 times a week and on those days I for sure do not weigh and measure. My granddaughter thinks that I shouldn't leave her sight and my grandson thinks that I should share every thing I am eating. I enjoy them though even if they do wear me out.

My adopted daughter is having her 3rd baby in July. Thankfully we were able to take her and boyfriend to courthouse to get married. Her biological mother came to see her for a couple of weeks that was stressful also but we got along alright. We both agreed that neither one of us was able to inspire our daughter to clean. I fought with her for years and finally for the most part gave up on it and pray the Lord will help her get motivated.

I just can't seem to climb out of this pit of depression. I have had quite a few close friends and relatives pass away in the last two years. I sure miss them. I have a dear Aunt with Alzheimer that I use to visit with alot and I still do but of course she doesn't really know where she is and it is so sad. She was the Co Pastor of our little Church for probably 30 years. I have had some wonderful christian people in my life and I am blessed. I hope and pray that I can be a light for other people that they have been to me. emoticon

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • LORRAINE10141
    *HUGS*
    2184 days ago
  • KADULAC
    I'm sorry you are struggling so much. You can do this, and we are here for you. Keep keeping on and you will be that much healthier for it. emoticon
    2234 days ago
  • BUCS1221
    Ruthie,
    Don't beat yourself up, take one day at a time and it is a normal thing to feel depressed because you are grieving over the losses in your life. Try to give yourself a me time it helps and taking walks when u can, I know it is hard right now because of the weather but spring is coming around the corner. Hang in there my spark friend. I will keep you in my prayers. emoticon emoticon emoticon and remember emoticon God Loves u and He is always there for us!!!!
    Love, spark friend
    Tammy
    2234 days ago
  • no profile photo CD14387431
    You are doing the best you can with where you are at for now! Don't be so hard on Yourself! Just push a little harder each day and you'd be surprised at how far you will actually get! Start small and increase each day..... YOU have a lot on your plate, be kind to yourself. FIND "ME" TIME! Take care of yourself first so you can take care of others! You are so caring-- that you might loose your identity in the process!
    Get the help you need for the depression, have a doctor evaluate it.
    It is okay to be selfish once in a while. For the month of February, LOVE YOURSELF!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2258 days ago
  • GENRE009
    Ruthie Hi!
    I feel you do have reasons to be depressed, if you need grief counseling, do that because you are worth it. there are places that are cheaper in that than regular channels.but it may be that you aren't really eating like you should when you take care of others, or have someone you loved die. Being low in magnesium foods do throw you into depression. But a lot od doctors will tell you that not getting into the sun gets people depressed. they always seem to suggest talking vitamin D3 for that because it is far too dangerous to get into this weather. Having an illness keep you sick for a lot of weeks is an indication that you are run down. I don't think you are living in a cold house are you? It would harm you, and your grand kids. I think you are very low in vegetables, those are the things that keep you from depression, and healthy . get all the snacks that aren't good for kids out of the house too, you are only running yourself & others own. Take care, and I hope you feel better. eva
    2260 days ago

    Comment edited on: 2/3/2015 12:26:17 PM
  • HANNAHSGRAMMIE
    I agree with Donna. You are doing a lot more exercise/burning calories than you think. Check out this site to determine how much you are exercising per day with just normal activities.

    http://www.healthstatus.com
    /calculate/cbc

    I know that SP considers "exercise" when you do something for 10 consecutive minutes, but when you are chasing after little ones, you are exercising!!! I'll keep Hannah and the new baby for the first time tomorrow. I know it will be a challenge, but it is so worth all the energy to spend this precious time with them.

    About your depression--it is normal when you've lost so many people in a relatively short time. One thing to do is to decide if it's "normal" down in the dumps depression or clinical depression. If that's the case, I'm a firm believer in telling your doctor about it--this advice coming from someone who plain lied to the doctor every time he'd ask about depression. He'd ask since that's a major symptom of MS.

    Anyway, email me any time you want and we can share grandchildren stories.

    Ronda

    2260 days ago
  • no profile photo CD5941250
    Grief can take a long time especially when you have lost several who are close to you past away in a short time. Give yourself some time. You should try to track when you are baby sitting. You might be surprised by how much exercise you are getting. Remember the kids are young and are supposed to be growing and gaining weight. It can be hard to watch what you eat in those circumstances but if you see how much exercise you are getting from them, you might be inspired to track food too. It's always a revelation.

    Be well
    2260 days ago
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