This morning, on a whim, I decided to look at my BMI. I am a 5'7" woman who now weighs 210 pounds.(That makes me obese) I have super pale skin, light blue eyes, golden blonde hair and very light freckles on my arms. If you looked at a typical day in my life, it would look something like this... I wake up at 6:30 am. I shower, get dressed, make some oatmeal and black coffee and jump in the car to go to work. I eat my oatmeal and drink my coffee as I drive to work, often singing along to songs on the radio. I arrive to work usually a little bit before 8:30. I am an elementary school teacher. I check my email, I run around making copies. I'm not a regular classroom teacher. My job is to provide interventions for kids who aren't performing at the same level as their peers. Throughout the day, I go from class to class picking up kids and walking them back to my little room. I'm always on my feet and my fitbit tells me that I tend to get 6,000-8,000 steps during the school day. Between groups, I stop and grab a quick lunch, often at my desk while I catch up on something or another. For the sake of ease, I tend to eat the same thing every day: greek yogurt, a granola bar, and an apple. By this point I'm probably also filling up my water bottle for the umpteenth time. I tend to drink 100 ounces or more everyday. In fact, I tote both a 32 oz and a 24 oz Nalgene bottle full of water in my work bag every day, just in case I get caught up in something and can't get to refill one of the bottles. My afternoon is jam-packed as I teach everything from first grade phonics to 5th grade math. By the time the last kids' voices filter out of the halls, I am typically doing a little extra planning or paper work. Somewhere between 4:30 and 5:30, I decide to head for home. When I get home, I usually have a few minutes before my husband gets there (depending on what shift he is working) So, I work on some chore (laundry, dishes, straightening up the clutter, random stuff) before starting dinner. A typical dinner for us is chicken and veggies. Occasionally we go out. Sometimes we drink beer with our dinner. We might sit and watch TV for a while before bed, while my husband works on homework for his MBA. Other days, we make a run out to the gym to get in half an hour of cardio before bed. Usually our cats are pestering us for attention by the time we get home in the evening, unless they are too busy bothering each other. It's a happy life, overall.
We've built this life and routine over the past year and a half. Also, over the past year and a half, I have put on 30 pounds. How? I don't really know. I blame our vacations and beer. However, I don't really feel obese despite what the numbers say. I feel overweight, sure, but not more than other people I know. I have my issues with stretch marks and all, but I feel pretty normal. I'm still strong and capable. Here is a very honest snapshot of what I look like right now.
When I look in the mirror, I don't always love what I see. I know I'm bigger than I used to be, but I don't feel unattractive.
What I really am is....
A wife who tries really hard to keep things as happy as possible for a husband who is sometimes super stressed out by his current job.
A daughter to two loving parents.
A granddaughter who is lucky enough to still have two living grandparents.
A sister who misses her sisters who all live at least three hours away.
An aunt to 4 adorable little children.
A proud, and sometimes annoyed mama to two little fur babies
A woman who is yearning for the day when she'll get to mother children of her own.
A woman who hiked Mount Washington this summer.
A woman who danced literally all night at my cousin's wedding.
A woman who loves reading, singing, history, making baby quilts, dancing in the kitchen, traveling to new places and visiting old favorites.
I am so much more than an obese woman. I am more than a number on the scale.