Birthdays can invoke joy, sadness, memories. Being introspective, I think about the past, present, and future. I think about my parents. When I could have ended up with any parents in the universe, why was I so blessed to end up with such incredible ones? When my parents met, my father was a widower with 5 young children. My mother was a divorcee that escaped a cruel violent husband with 2 small children. They must have been a little crazy, but they married and adopted each other’s children. I arrived two-years later. The tying link. Each of my siblings erroneously believed that they were my parents’ favorite. I know the truth. It was me. Obviously. If you knew my siblings, you would agree. Me = Awesome. Them = not as awesome as ME! (Pardon me, my “youngest child” is showing.)
Comparing myself to last year, I have changed. A lot. My goal was to be physically healthier than I was. I actively addressed health issues that have gone on for years. I voluntarily took some nasty medical tests -- there has to be a better way. I question why I allowed myself to feel awful for so long. Why did I not make my health a priority? Why did I not make myself a priority?
Inside has been an explosion of growth. I am an introvert that likes people. I avoid social situations as they trigger severe anxiety. My faith has always been important to me. Last year I joined a church where I did not know one soul. I spent months watching the sermon videos online before getting up the nerve to step through the door. Now I help with the children’s ministry and have joined the women’s Bible study which I actually enjoy. Who'd have thunk?
I have actively sought to improve the areas that were lacking in my life. I realized that it is important to be intentional in life. Bills, repairs, cleaning, obligations, work will suck the life out of you and your relationships. It is important to intentionally seek and make joyful opportunities.
A year ago, if anyone had ever told me I would be active in an online support system, I would have laughed at them. Participating here is so unlike the old me. On Spark I have discovered:
I am strong.
I am vulnerable.
I crave to support others.
I crave support from others.
Being alone is necessary.
Being a part of a group is necessary.
A scale is an important tool.
A scale is the least important tool.
This journey is all about me.
This journey is all about you.
Looking towards the future, I plan on continuing my trek towards health. There isn’t a goal. It isn’t about when I reach this weight or achieve that medical test result, this adventure is lifelong. I deserve to stay the course. So do you.
By my next birthday I will have participated in Spark for 635 days. I have never been one to make resolutions, but we have already established that I am changing. So today I resolve that I will:
Continue on my healthful odyssey.
Complete three more Whole30’s by my next birthday.
Address health issues as they occur. They don’t go away.
Actively seek social situations, even though they are out of my comfort zone.
So how does my birthday lead to you? You, my friends, are gifts. Today I am thankful for the uniqueness of each of you. You bring something special to the table. Each of you amazes me in a different way. Some of you bring laughter. Some of you bring motivation. Some of you share knowledge that informs and makes us think. Some of you share beauty. Some of you have overcome struggles and obstacles that would break a lesser person. Each of you makes yourself vulnerable by sharing a part of yourself. Each of you brings a friendship that has made me a better person. I thank God for bringing you into my life. Spark friends are real friends-- CHELZANNE’s recent blog validated this. www.sparkpeople.com/mypa
Until next time. Be Safe. Be Strong. Be Healthy. Keep Sparking!