After working a long day, I make a quick stop to the grocery store for some last minute items, then rush home to prepare a delectable feast for my family. Dinner is prepared and quickly consumed. Now that it is time to do dishes, my men folk have mysteriously disappeared. They know I am just going to have to call them in a few minutes. Why do they disappear like that? It is the same every night. I start dishes, I call them. They ignore me. I call them again. They ignore me. I call them with frustration in my voice. They yell back “We heard you. Geez.” Yep. Paradise.
So there I was starting the dishes. Why does the dog always ask to go out as soon as I put my hands in the soapy water? Since the heathens that I live with are afar and asunder, aka playing video games or surfing the net in their rooms, it is up to me to let K.C. out. There is no towel in my immediate reach, so I wipe soapy water on my clothes. It’s late. I don’t care at this point. I open the door and give her my usual warning. “Don’t bark and be good.” Yeah right. She listens as well as her human brothers.
My hands are now thrust back into the soapy water. 5… 4… 3… K.C. bangs at the back door to come in. Once again I wipe my hands on my clothes and let her in. I tell her “That was fast” as she runs past me. My hands are once more plunged into the soapy water. I turn the rinse water on when I smell something like burning rubber coming from the drain. I call my husband to the kitchen. He takes one whiff and starts to panic. He is frantically looking for some kind of leak in the kitchen. It seems to be coming out of the drains and is starting to permeate the house.
K.C. is a seizure dog, so we are concerned that the smell will throw her into one. I grab her and carry her up to my son’s room. Husband is still trying to find the source downstairs when the dog starts vomiting. We make the decision to load her into the car to get her away from the smell. As we gather her up, husband is placing a call to 911.
Sons, dog, and I jump in the car and roll the windows up to minimize the odor getting into the car. As we drive through the neighborhood we can still smell it through the closed windows. The leak must be widespread because we have now gone a mile with no relief from the odor. K.C. continues to vomit sporadically and we make the decision to bring her to the emergency vet.
We get to the vet and explain to the receptionist what is going on. As we are explaining, oldest son is getting a phone call from his dad. He steps outside to take the call. The vet comes from the back yelling “Who brought a dog in here that’s been skunked!?! Take it outside!” Youngest son takes her out. I explain she hasn’t been skunked, there is a leak of some kind and she must have been near it. The vet gives me a look like “Is she really this dumb? Why do I get all the crazies on Friday nights? Is the moon full? Where the heck was this woman raised? And who let her have children?” Yes, that one look said all that. She very calmly, and very slowly, explained to me the formula that I needed to mix up to bathe the dog in and sends me on my way.
When I get outside, my son hands the phone to me. My husband informs me that according to the four firemen that showed up in full gear with sirens blaring that the dog was skunked. Yeah, I know. I wonder if he explained how she wasn’t really skunked to the firemen like I did to the vet.
We get home and I have to send my husband out to get the ingredients for the dog’s special bath. As he drives away, he sees a skunk meandering down the road. Salt in the wound. Yep. A typical Friday night in Paradise.
(Now I know my buddy Skeeter and my friend Roxanne probably figured this out by the third paragraph. If it took you until the end, throw some glitter on yourself because we must be related.)
Magic Formula for Bath:
1 quart of 3-percent hydrogen peroxide (available at any pharmacy)
1/4 cup baking soda.
1 teaspoon original Dawn liquid dishwashing soap.
Rub into dog's fur and rinse. May require more than one bath.
Until next time. Be Safe. Be Strong. Be Healthy. Keep Sparking!