Where Does The Time Go?

It has been almost 2 months since I last updated. I don't know where the time goes... I know part of the reason is I feel like there isn't anything to update. I am not actively doing anything GREAT to get towards my goals so that makes me feel like updating is pointless. You wonderful people will say that's not at all true but that's just because you are all too nice!! ;)

I will say in not so earth shattering news as it has only been a couple pounds, but I finally got back into the 220's. I went back into my records and I have not see the 220's since May of 2018! As the title of my blog says where does the time go? I remember when I met Luke Bryan for the first time in June of 2017 (you remember big life events like that LOL!) I was about 235. This just shows how comfortable I've become with being in the 230's that it's been hard to shake. The lowest I think I have gotten between then and now is around 217, maybe a few pounds less. While I say comfortable with the 230's I know right away that comfortable isn't the right word. There is NOTHING comfortable about the 230's for me. Walking is hard, going up my stairs is hard, my knees are under extra unnecessary pressure... but the more you see a number the more you are beaten over the head with it and the more it becomes the new normal.

It's so funny because when I was initially coming down from 272, 230 was a dream. 230 felt amazing, and I was so proud of being that low. But on the upswing (I was as low as 181), it is definitely a different ball game. It is frustrating, it's defeating and it's uncomfortable. I started the year at 241 and I am 228 today. Part of me looks at that and says wow what a waste of 8 1/2 months, the other half of me says wow, at least you did a little something positive. I am more than capable of gaining about 30 pounds in a year (if I am really that far off the rails), so the fact that I am not in the 260's is a relief. But while that is a relief I don't want that to give me permission to start going in the wrong direction.

My brother (my biggest supporter in this fight) really wants to see me lose 8 pounds this month. We are half way through the month and I have only lost 3 pounds, there is a very good chance I won't hit that goal, but if I could even lose 2 more to get to a loss of 5 pounds lost I know he will still be happy and so will I. I have to remember progress is progress.

In fun news I work Sat-Tues (I work 12 hour shifts 3x a week and one 8 hour shift every other week)... .then I am off for TEN DAYS! I will be on a road trip to see... you guessed it... Luke Bryan. He is playing Fresno, Wheatland (near Sacaramento), Mountain View (near San Jose) and South Lake Tahoe. I am going to the first 2 with a friend although we are not sitting together. Then she will be flying back home and I am going onto the next two alone, but a fellow concert buddy is sitting with me at the other two shows. It is definitely going to be a first for me, seeing him 4 nights in a row. He rarely does 4 nights in a row to begin with, my previous record was 3 nights in a row but at the same venue. I am doing about a 3-4 hour drive most days to keep up with him, it is going to be exhausting but I think it'll be worth it.

I have to say that with my mystery health issues (my right side of my body is swollen and no one knows why), my known health issues (rheumatoid arthritis which is in a nasty flare right now, and then add my metal plate and screw in my left leg/ankle), I often worry about the future of my mobility. The reason I am able to do as much traveling and Luke stalking as I do is highly dependent on my mobility and the fact that I am able to do these things alone. While I try not to spend time thinking about things that may never happen, I am trying to do all the things I want to do now while I can and am physically able to just in case. That on top of the fact I spent so many years not doing what I wanted cuz I let my weight hold me back and I feel the need to make up fo lost time.

If you read this boring blog, you are definitely too nice, but I appreciate you! ;)