Bad News from Home

Saturday, July 09, 2011

Today I got an email from my uncle. My mum (who's only 66 and has dementia and lives in a care home in England) has been taken to hospital with water on her lungs and is on oxygen. I hope she's comfortable and that we get better news soon... It really makes me realise that I have to work at my health. If I am in the same position as my mum at 66, the girls will still be in their 20s or early 30s.... I want to be there for them.

I've started my clean eating... this morning I had my old breakfast though - but that's not bad, kashi cereal with flax seed and hemp hearts added with almond milk and a couple of raisins thrown in.

For an early lunch I had cold brown rice (I cooked extra yesterday) with some grilled turkey and some spinach salad, with tomatoes a little dressing (not totally eat clean but not bad) and almonds and tomatoes. It wasn't half bad! It's kept me comfortable for a while.

After I heard about my mum I did eat a Skinny Cow ice cream though... definitely not clean eating. But I do need to get them all eaten ;o)

Being this far away from mum brings on the guilt big time. It's hard - there is no way we could move back to England even if we wanted to, which we definitely don't want to do. I feel incredibly guilty that she is there, in the hospital and I am not able to go to see her. However, she would probably not know me or remember my visit even moments afterwards. The care home is wonderful and the staff are all very caring. In the hospital, she is in safe hands. She is being looked after. Her brothers and her mum are in the same part of England so they can visit her. My poor grandmother who is in her mid 80s has to visit her daughter in an old people's home... and her daughter usually doesn't recognise her.

Guilt doesn't work too well with clean eating unfortunately - especially when things need clearing from the cupboards and I've just eaten a cinnamon roll - telling myself that it needs to be out of the kitchen. However, I will be more focussed tomorrow - and I mean it. I am going to bake some of Tosca's biscotti and some other healthy and clean bits and pieces for our lunches next week at work and day care. Slowly I will rid the cupboards of crackers and other non-clean lunch items and hopefully transition the girls away from this kind of food and towards a cleaner and healthier life.

I'm hoping to get a longer run training session in tomorrow - it's only 5 weeks until the half marathon. I will try my interval app rather than the C25K app and see how I go. I'm not sure where I'll go but hopefully I'll find somewhere flat. My friend who is signed up for the half as well had a bicycle accident this week and has injured herself. I'm not sure whether this will impact her doing the half... Hopefully we'll get to catch up properly tomorrow or early in the week.

I have my fingers crossed for my mum... I hope she's improving.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I'm so sorry to hear about your mom! I know that is stressful--I'll keep her and your family in my prayers. I tend to be an emotional eater, but sometimes it helps me to ask myself, "What is it that I really want--what would make me feel better?" And sometimes I realize that I am really tired and need a nap, or that I feel lonely so I need to talk to a friend, or sometimes I just need to get out of the house by myself so I can think. If you ever need to talk, just e-mail me!
    emoticon emoticon emoticon amy
    3598 days ago
  • TIGGER2094
    Sorry to hear about your mum, praying for you and your family.
    3598 days ago
  • RWALTON730
    I'm sorry to hear about your mom. I will hold you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. emoticon

    3598 days ago
  • MISSME1223
    my heart goes out to you...having sick family is hard and stressful...

    big (((HUGS))) and lots of get well wishes for your mum...

    3599 days ago
  • no profile photo CD9005788
    I hope everything works out well for your family, my heart goes out to you, my grandfather had dementia and I know how heartbreaking it is for the family. I certainly hope her health improves. Skinny Cow ice cream should be illegal lol... it's hard to justify having it in the freezer and not eating it :) but just as long as you don't restock it you should make out fine! :) emoticon
    3599 days ago
    My thoughts and praters are with you and your family. I really hope that everything turns out good for your Mom.
    3599 days ago
    naww sending you my thoughts and love. i hope everything works out ok! always here if you need anything XxX
    3599 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10364891
    Can you set up video skype sessions with your mum? Sometimes it helps to connect and just see each other's faces even if its through video! I'm so sorry to hear that she's not doing well..it must be difficult. Glad you're still working on being healthy. Agree with Jessnstone - exercise definitely helps with stress! emoticon
    3599 days ago
    Thinking of you and your mom. I am a huge emotional eater and always turn to the "junk" when I've heard bad news. I hope your mom gets better soon. And remember, exercise is a great stress reducer!
    3600 days ago
    I hope you get some good new regarding your mother soon.
    3600 days ago
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