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One Year and 53 lbs....

Friday, October 21, 2011

Today marks my one-year anniversary here on SP and I’m thrilled that during that year I’ve gone from 230 lbs to 177! I feel healthier than I have in years. I’ve gotten my blood glucose reading under control without the aid of drugs (I was pre-diabetic) and have been able to get completely free of some of the meds I was taking for other reasons. I’ve learned the power of prayer in the weight loss and fitness area of my life, and of placing my choices in God’s hand and listening for His guidance through His word and oftentimes, through the words and wisdom of Spark People’s gurus and my wonderful Spark Friends. So many changes and so much progress and I’m excited about that. I’m eternally grateful to SP and all the resources available here.

At the same time, I’m feeling rather discouraged because I seem to have lost my motivation. I’m still exercising almost daily and that’s a plus, but lately I’m having a difficult time dealing with food. I did so well for so long and I’m not sure why the struggle now, but whatever the reason, I am having a tough time with it. Food has always been a huge part of life, as far back as my memory will take me, during both good times and bad. It’s been a comfort and a friend, a way to please others, a way to appease the demons I’ve dealt with. I know those things and thought I’d dealt with them and gotten past them, but here I am, struggling with them all over again.

I’ve come far enough that I’m not about to give up and give in to this. I know for sure that I don’t want to go back to where I was before SP – that isn’t an option. That only leaves one choice, and that is to work my way thru this and get to the other side. I know what I want and I know what it will take to get there. So why am I having such a hard time staying on track? Am I afraid of failing? Or is my fear of succeeding? Am I scared of where success might take me? Or that I really can’t do this? God knows I’ve tried countless times before and failed!

It's time to refocus and begin anew. By the grace of God, and in His power, that’s what I will do. I’m over halfway to my goal and I plan to celebrate my second SP anniversary at a normal, healthy weight!

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. God has promised that, and I believe it.

I’m in this for the long haul…year one was just the beginning. Onward now to year 2 of the journey!

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Congrats on YOUR weith loss and ONE YEAR . It is not uncommon atthis point to wounder about the demons ,look at what you have accomplished in one year. NEXT year will be great !!! Set new goals and together we can and will do this. TAHE CARE . Dottie
    3482 days ago
  • LUVS2BIKE101
    I am with you, too! And I'm so glad you are not going to give up! You are to be commended with all of your successes so far. There is much yet to be done. Let's do it together, one step at a time!
    3482 days ago
    53 pounds is a huge victory! You got rid of a 6 year old child! It's common at this point to begin to have to face the struggles that got you to an unhealthy size in the first place. Something was appealing about it, it provided for some sort of need in your life. Sometimes it's grief or self-hatred or a way to hide from past abuse...whatever holds you there, it's significant. You obviously have what it takes to make it, now it's time to address the ambivalence. What risk do you run by letting the pounds go?
    When you find out, bring it to God so He can assuage your fears. Hopefully then you can keep going.
    3483 days ago
    Woohoo! Congrats on such a great accomplishment!! The enemy would love for you to not focus on how great you have done and how much you have accomplished, and to instead look at the challenges you are having now. But he is a lie! You have done wonderfully and with God's strenght will continue to do wonderfully! Here's to your future success!! Woohoo!

    3483 days ago
  • SAL1512
    You have lost weight and started a healthy life style in the past.
    You can do it in the future!
    3487 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4295992
    Congratulations on the wonderful changes you have made.

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3487 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/23/2011 8:55:37 AM
    Congratulations on your 1st Year Sparkversary & Congrats on your weight loss - you should be super proud of yourself!! Remember everything you have accomplished this year - it will help inspire you & motivate you during your second year!!!

    3488 days ago
    When our goals are in sight and we feel just a wee bit proud of ourselves and the constant grind of self control seems to have wearied us, that is the time Ole Scratch comes in for the kill.

    (Gal 6:9) "Be not weary in well doing for in due season you shall reap, if you faint not" Pray for added strength to endure. God will bless you with not only desire but determination and diligence. Then you can give God all the credit because ..."greater is He that is in you, than he that is in the world".(John 4:4)

    I'm praying for you too.
    3488 days ago
  • VICIOUS421
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3489 days ago
    emoticon 53# is something to be proud of


    You are doing emoticon

    Pretend that it is emoticon again


    3489 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/22/2011 12:07:35 AM
    That is why I am back at the top of my number again.... I realize I retreated from success because it brought visibility. I know...we can't hide at this size but my brain thought I could at the time. Ugh!

    So...maybe it will help you to share how you got yourself motivated at the very beginning for those 53 pounds. I know it would be information I'm interested in as I need a kick!
    3489 days ago
  • no profile photo CD10018622
    I'm with you, cheering you on, running alongside you to succeed together in our mutual journey to better health. I've been where you are, right at the time of my first year anniversary as AbigailSing. After a short break to get God's heart for my direction, returning to try anew, something snapped into place in me, and I am going strong again. You can do this one new day, even one freash BREATH at a time.
    3489 days ago
    emoticon Happy happy Sparkversary! emoticon And emoticon on getting your emoticon today! I haven't ordered mine yet, but need to soon. Maybe it will be just the thing to help you out of the slump you seem to be in. I can so relate to where you are now. I wrote a blog the other day about being afraid to fail or afraid to succeed. Like you I have no intentions of going back. So...slow and steady we continue on! We can do this emoticon !
    3489 days ago
    emoticon !!! emoticon !!! emoticon You've done so very well!! Year 2!! Keep on truckin'!!!!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    3489 days ago
  • no profile photo CD6427585
    Hmmm... Well, first HAPPY SPARKEVERSARY!!! emoticon And 2nd, shame on you for not TELLING us! I would have included it in my letter this morning! emoticon But 53 pounds in a year is SUPER EXCELLENT! It's slow steady loss and that is usually permanent loss! You are really doing GREAT!

    As for the lack of motivation... I can SO relate to that! I've been having an awful time for the past few months. But even WORSE since this challenge started. It's been AWFUL!!! But I got a revelation the other day that really kicked my resolve back into action. I've been doing this Weight Loss Bible study for about a year and a half now... and I have NEVER bought in the idea that my food temptations came from the evil one... but last weekend when I went to put my weight in on the weigh-in and REALIZED that I had dedicated THIS 8 weeks to God, and that ever since then I have been attacked relentlessly by food choices that were NOT beneficial to me... it really made me take a 2nd look! And now I'm pretty determined not to let him have his WAY with ME!!! NOPE! So there we are. Keep prayin' girl! You'll get that motivation back!!! Ask Him to SHOW you where that roaring lion is waiting to devour you! emoticon
    3489 days ago
  • PICKIE98
    When that happened to me, I pretended like I was just starting out, like this weight was my starting weight,, I want five more pounds off,, so I started up like new,, IT really helped! HE will guide you!!
    3489 days ago
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