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Fantastic Christmas - terrible weigh in

Friday, December 28, 2012

This is mostly a recap blog for 2012. Sometime in the next few days I will post goals for the new year. This is going to be a whiny, self-pitying, pathetic blog so feel free to skip it. Please keep in mind that there will be a more positive one following within the week that includes a real plan for the new year.

Basically this last year has been crap and I've handled it badly. I was maintaining (as opposed to gaining) until September when I dropped my Curves membership. I thought I could figure out a new workout routine on my own, but I never really managed it. Plus I've been eating like crap too. Too much, and the wrong stuff. I'm pretty pissed at myself to be honest. I'm especially disgusted since earlier today I stumbled across some pictures of myself 20 pounds lighter and I was fat then. I don't even want to think about what other people see me as now. Clearly my mirror can't be trusted.

I've been burying my emotions with food, and that's pissing me off but I can't seem to stop. I can't even blame the holidays. Sure I made a bunch of cookies, lasagna, and a ham dinner but if I had just stayed with that I would've been ok. The real problem is all the other crap I've been shoving in my pie hole. Some of it I don't even really like, so what the hell is my problem?

I weighed the day after Christmas and I was officially 100 pounds over my high school weight. Not a landmark I was hoping to hit. Pretty soon I'm going to have to call in to work because the only thing that fits is my bed (points for those who get the reference).

Bad stuff has happened over the last couple of years, but food won't fix it. Time to get my sh*t together.

On the up side - I had a great Christmas. I got everything I asked for, and some stuff I didn't ask for. I sit typing this on a new laptop from my folks (I guess my dad got tired of fixing my old one), and very happy with the goodies I received all around. My folks came down and we had a great several days together. I'm so grateful for my family, and sometimes I need to work harder to remember how lucky I am. The best gift of all this year was that hubby quit smoking. Today is his 2 week mark and I'm so proud of him. He's never made it past day one before so this is huge. Prayers/good thoughts for his continued success would be appreciated.

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  • no profile photo CD1403645
    Sometimes the self pity blogs are the BEST way in the world to gain a bit of perspective. There is NO shame in that whatsoever!!!! Like you, I am very happy to put 2012 in the books and move on.

    Awesome to have a new laptop!! Woohoo!!! I also will keep your hubs in my thoughts (and you!) I remember when my dad quit smoking -- he was GRUMPY but he did it and hasn't had a smoke in well over 23 years!!

    Girl, you can do this! I know that you can! I've said it many times before, but I wish we were closer, I would treat you to a coffee and we could hang out and talk. I think you're an amazing person and you WILL make your goals this year!
    3126 days ago
  • BIGPAWSUP
    Congrats on a great Christmas. You can do this! I have faith and confidence in you. You will have an awesome 2013
    3132 days ago
  • no profile photo CD2704340
    Glad you had a great Christmas! Regarding exercise--have you thought about using the Spark exercise videos on your new laptop? I've been trying that and it's working! I don't have to think--just follow along! LOL

    As for your DH's smoking cessation--well done! He's in my prayers for continued success.

    Keep Sparking! emoticon
    3132 days ago
  • SVELTEWARRIOR
    Now that you got the negative out......start 2013 thinking of all you are blessed with!!!!! I have faith that you will do great in 2013!!!! Congrats to your DH on quitting smoking.

    3132 days ago
  • no profile photo ELRIDDICK
    Thanks for sharing
    3132 days ago
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