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Countdown #4 - triggers

Thursday, February 07, 2013

Here I am supposed to address my triggers. The foods that derail me and the things that make me reach for them even though I know better.

It seems like this list grows every day. It used to be short and sweet, but it seems like it's growing exponentially. I've been feeling especially vulnerable lately and therefore more susceptible to bad food decisions than usual. I haven't been sleeping well, hubby's has been struggling with his work schedule which leads to increased stress for me as well, work has been hectic, and I'm working my way through a course of Prednisone which leaves me edgy, grumpy, sleep-deprived, hungry, slightly sick feeling, and 8 pounds heavier than I was a week an a half ago. I knew it was coming, but tonight I feel like I could open my mouth to the back door of a Hostess truck (just as well they went out of business) and load up. Right now my triggers are just about everything. Once I finish this round of meds and get a few good nights of sleep I will feel more in control. For now though...

FOODS - chocolate, chips, TRAIL MIX, breads, pizza, home-made baked goods, chocolate, peanut butter, popcorn, cappuccino, chocolate, diet coke, bacon, chocolate, valentine's candy (dislike the holiday, love the candy), oh and did I mention chocolate?

EVENTS - stress, sleepiness, sleep deprivation, feeling sick, feeling sorry for myself, feeling like I've earned it either as a reward or punishment, apathy, anger, boredom, frustration, celebration, it being Thursday (or Saturday, or whatever), laziness, hopelessness, happiness, giving in (let's face it, sometimes it's easier to eat what's put in front of us than to argue when someone else cooks). So yeah, pretty much life in general.

CHANGES - the other piece of this blog is how I'm going to avoid these triggers in the upcoming winter 5% challenge. The brutally honest truth is that I have no clue. Not one. I haven't been able to control myself thus far, so what' different this time? I'm in a pretty crappy head-space lately and frankly I'm all out of pep talks for myself. Funny how we can be so "up" for other people and ready to support one another at the slightest need, but be so down on ourselves at the same time. I'm going to give this one some thought and come back to it. It's going to come down to willpower - or won't power as an old neighbor of mine used to call it. I'm just going to have to track, stay in my range, and say no to the rest. I am going to give myself one high(er) calories day a week though so I can have a restaurant meal or a pizza or a high cal home-made treat. If I don't allow for that I will fail, so I'm going to have to build in a pressure valve.

Man alive do I sound whiny tonight. I'll be better tomorrow - promise. I'm just tired and stressed and more than a little disgusted with the side effects of the meds. I get to lower the dose again on Saturday though so I should start to feel better soon after.

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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    I think it's great that you are so honest! You don't need to feel sorry about being whiny! We all have days that we feel whiny!

    Take care of yourself and hopefully those cravings will be gone soon after you are done taking the prednisone! Know that your Spark Friends are here for you! emoticon
    3092 days ago
    Hope you are feeling better today. And good for you for looking at and recording all your triggers. I can't wait for this challenge to start.
    3094 days ago
    You are not whiny. You are being straight. Please take care of yourself
    3096 days ago
  • LYNCHD05
    Prednisone is an ugly drug but it works and hopefully you will not be on it long and will feel better soon. Good blog.
    3096 days ago
    You don't sound whiney at all, its honest- which is hard to do sometimes. And, I totally agree, its really hard to come up with a solid way to avoid them. Its hard. For me, I love sweets, and so I have tried to talk myself into this one decadent piece a night...sometimes its 2, sometimes its one with a cup of mexican hot chocolate.... semi-works, but its hard.

    Just take care of yourself, and hopefully, someone of those cravings will get better once you are off the prednisone. emoticon
    3096 days ago
    I love your blog! Don't you dare worry about being "whiney" after what you have listened to out of me!

    Prednisone is so useful but so NASTY. I don't know anyone who feels good on it. I hope it does it's job and gets out of your life quick!
    3096 days ago
  • no profile photo CD2112467
    I love your blog! You are so honest! I love that about you!
    3097 days ago
    We're doing similar assessment on trigger foods right now so it's going around! Know you're in good company and many of us are just as clueless. I guess in the end, we have to want good health/finally getting to goal more than the trail mix and chocolate in your house and the leftover M&M's and gummy sweet tarts taunting me in mine.

    Hang in there toots!
    3097 days ago
    Gosh, there was even a news segment about stress making people really sick and now it is young people who are stressed out the most.

    Take care of yourself. You are the only one who can.
    3097 days ago
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