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Ughh I want my life back.

Monday, April 21, 2014

So I weighed myself this morning and I weigh 182, which is nearly 20 pounds gain since my last weigh in three months ago at 163.5. I am absolutely disgusted. I have gotten to the point where I eat and eat until I physically feel sick, then feel so guilty that it got to that point that I just keep eating, and then sometimes drink to forget that the whole thing even happened. Like seriously, who does this? I clearly have a lot of issues that I need to work through.

But I WANT my body to feel good again. I can kind of remember what it felt like when I was so focused on my healthy habits, and I want that feeling back. So I have decided to get my butt back to the gym and start eating healthier. I want to say that I will have the same motivation and perseverance that I once had, but I know that this time I have a long, rocky road ahead of me to get there.

With the help of SP's Nutrition Tracker, I have devised the following eating plan:

Cal Fat Carb Prot Fib
FiberPlus Bar 120 4 26 2 9
Dannon Yogurt 80 0 16 5 0
Cantaloupe (1c) 54 .5 13 1.5 1.5
254 4.5 55 8.5 10.5

Avocado (1/3 of 1) 106 9.75 5.7 1.3 0
Beets (sliced, 1/2c) 53 .2 12.2 1.5 3
Perdue Chicken (.5c) 90 2 1 16 0
Hardboiled Egg (1) 211 14 2 17 0
Ken's Lite Bals (2tb) 60 4.5 3 0 0
Romaine (1/2c) 8 0 2 1 1
528 30.5 26 37 4
BF/LUNCH totals 782 35 81 45.5 14.5
DINNER ~618 ~25 ~119 ~15 ~10

SP gave me the guidelines below which is where I got my dinner totals for above:
Consume between 1200 & 1550 calories
Consume between 27 & 60 grams of fat
Consume between 135 & 252 grams of carbs
Consume between 60 & 136 grams of protein
Consume between 25 & 35 g of Fiber
Consume at least 8 cups of water per day.

I know this plan will not work forever, but I think to get back in the swing of things I am really going to need a concrete plan that I can stick to religiously. Once I start seeing some results and get my motivation back, I will adjust accordingly.

So I hope this will all work out. If any of you have ever been in a rut like this before (which I know most of you have!), PLEASE feel free to give me any advice you might have. I can't even remember how I went from doing so well and feeling so good to allowing myself to let it go downhill so quickly. So I especially don't know how to find my way back now that it has gotten to this point. Any advice would be appreciated.

Thanks all! Hope you had an awesome Easter weekend!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • 52BINCE
    Sounds like the typical yo yo syndrome of challenges to weight loss n healthy lifestyle...... been there done that...... Do not get frustrated n remember rome wasn't built in a day!!!!!!! If you read my blogs you may find some help to reach your goals without putting pressure on yourself....
    2539 days ago
    If I had a nickle for every time I re-gained weight....oh what I can do with all that money! You got your wake-up call and that's great! You are well on your way to taking it off.
    2566 days ago
    I ve been there. I AM there. but you noticed it now and can make the changes!
    2571 days ago
    Yep, I have done the very same thing.

    I focus on one or two small things that I can do; quit beating myself up; and get back with the program.

    2571 days ago
  • SUMMER2203
    i can totally relate -- i just finished up about 3 weeks of exactly the same thing (also gained about 12 lbs in 3 weeks...). like literally all i could think about was eating. then i would eat til i was sick. then eat more.

    i wish i knew what snapped me out of it so that i could share it with you...but hopefully we can figure it out together!!
    2571 days ago
    You've had a rough time of it since January, lighten up on yourself! I'm thinking you might need a bit of an antidepressant. I'm surprised the doc didn't think of it. You might get a second opinion? This is seriously affecting your life. Another idea I have... it could be S.A.D. These are just ideas, I think a second opinion is in order.

    2571 days ago

    Comment edited on: 4/21/2014 10:47:01 AM
    Oh, my dear Sarah. emoticon

    We have all been there at some point or another, myself included. With support and encouragement, I know you can get back the movement mojo you once had.

    For me, every time I wind up in a rut like that and realize it, I figure out what I want to do and start small. 10 minutes fitness every day, a small achievable goal, 8+ waters a day. Some days are harder than others, but it does get easier. Right now for me, I'm trying to figure out how to get out of bed at 6am to workout!

    You can do it Sarah. Keep your head up and remember not to be so hard on yourself. Push yourself, but don't beat yourself up about what has happened. You CAN change it.

    2571 days ago
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