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AMANDADAY63's Photo AMANDADAY63 Posts: 1,579
1/16/12 9:43 P

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I echo the sentiments of others...I have one son who lives, breathes, worships all things electronic/techy, and i have had many battles along the same lines...i have very srict guidelines regarding time limites for computer, playstation, gameboy, phone etc and he knows now that i mean what i say...howver, he, like every other preteen, will push the boundaries at ties!! My other son is very violent and struggles with negative responses, so no matter how many times i set limits he constantly breaks rules...but i havent stopped trying!!
As parents, we ALL mess up, give in smetimes when we shouldnt, and sometimes we cause our own problems with our kids due to our parenting decisions, but there is ALWAYS another opportunity to renew the rules, guidelines, etc
Just a suggestion here, but maybe you could talk to your son when he is not playing or upset etc and plan a reasonable schedule together..then writeit up in simple form, both sign it, post it on the wall...then you have something for you to refer to when he pushes the limits...you can even agree to revisit the issue at some predetermined future date if that is something helpful for you both to consider....good luck :)

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DEE797's Photo DEE797 Posts: 18,547
1/16/12 2:32 P

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Good Afternoon and Welcome,

I agree that letting your ds know there are consequences for his actions and sticking to them is the best thing you can do to keep your sanity and for your ds to understand that there are times he will not get his way.

I have a 20yo ds with high functioning and have not always been consistent, especially when it comes to electronics be it the computer or video games, and now pay the price at times for that inconsistency.

dee (D2)
Hutto, Texas
Central Time (CT)


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TINA2016's Photo TINA2016 Posts: 988
1/15/12 7:04 P

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G'day and welcome.
That sounds like a typical reaction from any 8 year old, with or without autism. It is so much easier to give in but as they get older the fights become harder. Maybe set up some sort of timetable for electronic usage. And also maybe rewards of extra time if he is good.
My son now looks me in the eye and at 15 he is very strong. Without boundaries I would not be able to control him now. My daughter is 14 today and we have yet to get total control but we take it day by day. Congrats on sticking to your guns and not backing down. He will also respect the boundaries. Come on over and join us at the Comfort Cafe.
hugs, tina

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My 30th wedding anniversary


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BEENIEMOM's Photo BEENIEMOM Posts: 8,045
1/15/12 6:15 P

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autism or not our children need to learn that there is a consequence for talking back and being rude and you need to stay strong and follow through with what you decided! He needs consistent expectations and he needs for you to always follow through or he will see that he can manipulate the situation to get his own way! I have raised a teen (not my own)whose mom had allowed him his video games to the extreme without taking anything away when he tantrumed.......he became a big strong teen who figured if he tantrums he will always get his way and a 240 pound teen who wants what he wants when he wants it can be dangerous! Teach your son now that you mean what you say...........never feel guilty about it .....and forgive yourself on those times when it seems to easy to give in because life with children with these additional difficulties is hard! I dont know you or him but I beleive the lessons of "a consequence for every action ..be it good or bad" is SO VERY IMPORTANT!

Without forgiveness life is governed by...an endless cycle of resentment and retaliation.

- Roberto Assagioli


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1/15/12 5:53 P

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my son is so dependent on electronics that he cannot function without. I guess its my fault cause i give in rather than be consistant. for instant he wanted to play computer tonite and i told him he was just on it and he stated talking back to me and getting frustrated. so i told him he could not play tonite. i hope he understands why i took computer time away. i dont know if i am disciplinning him right or not. He is 8 years old and has high functioning autism. any suggestions would help thanks

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